![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Well, I don't think I've actually made one of these posts before but I've been inspired by all the ones I've seen today on my flist, so here goes.
I realized I was bisexual when I was about 20. I had my first girlfriend when I was about 21 or 22. I was lucky enough to have two friends in college who identified as Bi, so I had no struggle wondering if I was gay or straight. I was Bi, that was clear.
After I graduated college, I moved in with my first girlfriend. My first live-in lover was a woman. I never thought of it that way before. The year after we split and I was back living with my Mom. My brother was the first in my family to know I was Bi and he never judged me for it. I wrote Mom a coming out letter and sat there while she read it and wept. She told me that she loved me no matter what, but that she thought she'd never be able to handle meeting one of my girlfriends. To this day, she hasn't.
A few months later, in the car riding with my Dad, he asked me if I was gay. I told him I was Bi. Then I went home and told Mom and I shared a cigarette with her - the last cigarette I ever had (it was a one time thing, really). So, with my parents, I've had kind of a "Don't ask, don't tell" policy. That was until I came out as polyamorous to them four years later. They handled that a lot worse than the bisexuality. We didn't speak for a few years and they didn't come to my wedding.
I stopped telling co-workers about my sexual orientation after my first job, because they just thought I was a freak. And I decided it was really none of their business. They saw men and women show up to work to take me on dates. That was it.
To the rest of the world, I really don't care who knows. Luckily I live in the San Francisco Bay area, and it's not an issue for me to walk in my neighborhood dressed in fetish clothes. I can walk down the street holding hands with my girlfriend and not fear for my life. I know I'm lucky. I know that's not the case everywhere.
That being said, I'm constantly pushing my own boundaries about who to be out to. I asked my husband what the neigbhors would think if they saw me kissing another man outside and approached him about it. My hubby said he'd tell them he was my boyfriend and that it was none of their business. I like that approach. (Direct and to the point, but that's what I expect from my husband.) A few of my neighbors know and they're queer too.
I've deeply loved women and I've deeply loved men, often at the same time. I've never apologized for who I am. I want there to be more Bi visibility. Before I went to acupuncture school, I was starting to get together interviews and photographs to make a coffee table book about bisexuals. We are SO diverse and there are really not a lot of image stereotypes for Bis. I want people to see that diversity. Maybe one day I'll get back to doing that book.
Love who you want to and be proud of who you are.
I realized I was bisexual when I was about 20. I had my first girlfriend when I was about 21 or 22. I was lucky enough to have two friends in college who identified as Bi, so I had no struggle wondering if I was gay or straight. I was Bi, that was clear.
After I graduated college, I moved in with my first girlfriend. My first live-in lover was a woman. I never thought of it that way before. The year after we split and I was back living with my Mom. My brother was the first in my family to know I was Bi and he never judged me for it. I wrote Mom a coming out letter and sat there while she read it and wept. She told me that she loved me no matter what, but that she thought she'd never be able to handle meeting one of my girlfriends. To this day, she hasn't.
A few months later, in the car riding with my Dad, he asked me if I was gay. I told him I was Bi. Then I went home and told Mom and I shared a cigarette with her - the last cigarette I ever had (it was a one time thing, really). So, with my parents, I've had kind of a "Don't ask, don't tell" policy. That was until I came out as polyamorous to them four years later. They handled that a lot worse than the bisexuality. We didn't speak for a few years and they didn't come to my wedding.
I stopped telling co-workers about my sexual orientation after my first job, because they just thought I was a freak. And I decided it was really none of their business. They saw men and women show up to work to take me on dates. That was it.
To the rest of the world, I really don't care who knows. Luckily I live in the San Francisco Bay area, and it's not an issue for me to walk in my neighborhood dressed in fetish clothes. I can walk down the street holding hands with my girlfriend and not fear for my life. I know I'm lucky. I know that's not the case everywhere.
That being said, I'm constantly pushing my own boundaries about who to be out to. I asked my husband what the neigbhors would think if they saw me kissing another man outside and approached him about it. My hubby said he'd tell them he was my boyfriend and that it was none of their business. I like that approach. (Direct and to the point, but that's what I expect from my husband.) A few of my neighbors know and they're queer too.
I've deeply loved women and I've deeply loved men, often at the same time. I've never apologized for who I am. I want there to be more Bi visibility. Before I went to acupuncture school, I was starting to get together interviews and photographs to make a coffee table book about bisexuals. We are SO diverse and there are really not a lot of image stereotypes for Bis. I want people to see that diversity. Maybe one day I'll get back to doing that book.
Love who you want to and be proud of who you are.
Tags:
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
From:
no subject